I took my first step into Target without a baby in tow. I had finally arrived. (insert praise hands emoji)
It was my first outing post baby #2, and boy was I excited.
After a long sigh, I headed to the Starbucks counter to buy a latte with my newly acquired gift card. Unfortunately, my starbucks iphone app wasn’t working and I was forced to pay cash. No worries, I wasn’t going to let that little bump in the road ruin my peaceful, blissful afternoon. As I took my first sips and began slowing pacing each and every aisle I saw loads of pretty things, but I didn’t get that feeling. You know, that feeling that everyone talks about on instagram. That feeling when you are finally alone in the magical land know as target?!
I didn’t understand. I had all the ingredients for the perfect afternoon but something wasn’t working. Maybe I needed to purchase something? Something that was worthy of being posted on social media, something worthy of the #targetdoesitagain hashtag?
I continued to search, but couldn’t seem to find the ‘thing’ that would satisfy my craving.
After topping off my latte I left Target EMPTY handed. *GASP! EMPTY. Not even a roll of paper towels, or an item from the dollar spot!!
I got in the car disappointed.
Target didn’t give me what I wanted.
I realize now that I was hoping for Target to give me peace, and for that peace to make me feel a certain way. Sure, I had peaceful moments that weren’t filled with baby cries, false potty alarms, random toddler screams and the occasional stranger glare. BUT I didn’t feel peaceful inside. Instead, my mind was racing with all the other things that I needed to get done and maybe then I would have some sort of peace?
I soon arrived home and saw this…
(This is a blurry iPhone picture because I scrambled to catch this moment)
All I heard was, this is YOUR peace.
No matter how hard you try, You can’t manufacture peace.
Right there in the middle of my hodgepodge living room, dog hair and all was MY picture of peace. My mind finally stopped racing.
I was reminded of who I was, reminded that the peace I wanted could not be earned or purchased. The peace I wanted can only be given by God, not when all the things are done. It’s a different kind of peace. Though I may think that in past seasons my works created peace, the truth is I was never the one creating anything. And I’m still NOT the one creating it now.
I’m trying my hardest to let the little things slide, and not steal that peace that comes from God. Like the spilled milk , the random grass stains, the kitchen floor that never seems to stay clean, and the mountains of laundry that are usually untamed. No nap days, crazy construction traffic, truck breaks down, and everyone woke up late. All these things mean nothing, when I remember God’s peace.
In this season as a young mom, peace has been wrapped in a completely different package but the gift is still the same.
More importantly the giver is still the same.
True peace isn’t based on circumstances.
I’m not sure what season you are in, but I’m betting your world is filled with busy. If you’re busy chasing peace like me, I encourage you to quit looking for it in target clearance aisles,your to-do list, or a scale, instead remember who the ultimate giver of peace is.
Even in the hard, ugly and mundane His peace is there.
Spend time with Him. Get to know Him. Let Him in.
*DON’T worry I will still be going to target & most likely enjoying a starbucks latte 🙂 You should do the same.